Lights, Camera, ...um wait a minute, how do I work this thing?

So Michael bought me an amazing camer for mommy's day. I love it but I have no idea what to do with it. I should take a class at the local college, but for now I'll have to read the users manual and ask all my super cool photography friends for their help.

I'm excited to pick up this new hobby and capture priceless moments of our family.

I love my husband, he's the best. How did I get so lucky?

To Blog, or not to blog? That is the question

I'm still trying to figure out what I want to use my blog for. Obviously, it's to keep family and friends updated on our lives and what new endeavors the kids are up to, but then there is the reflective side of me, the side that likes to share what I've learned about situations or other peoples experiences. Now here's the tough one, I'm a very personal person so I don't want to share too much, I mean isn't that what my journal is for? But if I'm keeping a journal, what's the purpose of a blog? I hardly have time for either one and if I've already written in my journal, do I want to write it again in the blog?

I LOVE to read other peoples blogs. But then I think how monotonous and boring my life is and if anyone would care to read my adventures, but then again, I can't really say that my life is boring, but I will remind you that it is definitely adventurous.

Like I said, I love reading other peoples blogs and what creative things they do with them, like designate a certain day of the week for a special update. I suppose I could do that, but as you can tell, I'm not very reliable on keeping this thing updated.

I guess I could just commit to be a better blogger and write whatever comes to mind, so here I go...

I'm still reflecting on our trip back east to see a lot of the church historical sites. Luckily, I already wrote about every spot we saw and every emotion felt in my journal (see what I mean about neglecting the blog), but the spirit of the trip is still alive. My testimony of the church is still burning, but the fire was rekindled and I feel a new commitment to be a better person; a better woman, wife, mother, and a better daughter of God.

The thing that strikes me is how Joseph and Emma Smith and the early saints just did what they knew to be right, it wasn't easy, but they knew it was right and it was God's will. The constant moving around and giving up of their possesions, the constant persecution. The loss of friends and family who didn't want anything to do with the church. The loss of loved ones. I am so grateful for all that they did, all that they sacrificed. If it wasn't for their testimonies and for their decision to follow the will of God, would we still have the church today?

Am I as strong? I often asked myself that question while visiting these sacred sites. Is my faith strong enough? Could I make those same decisions and sacrifices? It scares me to think that my answer maybe, "no", I'm that strong.

Which leads me to my next thought; the choices we make today, however small and insignificant they may seem, will have an effect on generations to come. When I think about it in that way, and see that what I do now will affect my posterity and others in the future, I know that I am strong, that I do have faith to be strong and endure persecution or whatever hardship awaits...at least I'm hoping I'm that strong.

In the moment, it doesn't seem like the difficult choice we are facing is really that big of a deal if we just give in or give up, and that it won't matter to anyone else, or affect anyone else. But it does. I know that choosing to do what's right, and choosing to follow God's will is the best choice. It may not make sense to anyone else and others may even think I'm crazy, heck they may never understand the reasoning behind my decision; but if I know in my heart that it is the right choice and that I'm following the Lord's will, as difficult as it may be, it's still the right choice. Choosing the right, wasn't meant to be easy. Making the right choice shouldn't be about pleasing others or worrying about what others may think of you, it's about peace of mind.

Since returning from the trip, I've had this itching desire to learn more about Emma Smith. What an amazing woman. I've purchased a few books on her and have begun reading one that is impossible to put down, but of course I put it down because I have my strippling warriors to tend to.

Speaking of my boys, oh how I love them. Tommy and Trenton have been in big boy undies all week, with few accidents. I don't even want to write about it, because once it's out there in the open, I just know that someone will start having accidents all the time, but this week has been pleasant. They went to preschool on Tuesday and Thursday and had no accidents at all, it was awesome. A friend of mine suggested that the boys get one M&M for peeing in the potty and two for pooping in the potty, it seems to be a great gesture so far.

It amazes me how fast they grow. I realize more everyday, how much time I have left to teach them to "choose the right" (ha-there is that phrase again) and to love Jesus and to be like him. To show them that Jesus is the ultimate role model, as well as other scriptural heroes. I'm so grateful for my calling in Primary, I love the kids I teach. First of all, they are so cute and so smart. I hope my boys will pick up on what we teach here at home and be just as smart. But I love re-learning the simpler things of the Gospel, the things that are so important, yet so basic, i.e. prayer, obedience, following the prophet, helping others, caring for others, reading the scriptures, going to church, etc.

Joseph is now in Nursery with his big brothers and he's done well so far. Having his brothers in there has been a huge help. Oh my babies are growing so fast.

I love Celine Dion. I've always been a fan but knowing her struggle with infertility has made me a bigger fan. I love the album, "A New Day", she reflects on the struggle and the joy of motherhood. Oh and her album--oh geez, I forget the title but the one with all the lullabies and songs about motherhood...I love that one as well. That was a random thought for ya.

Okay, so other things I've been up to is getting rid of junk, yup, I guess I'm a bit of a pack rat, but I've gotten better at trashing junk I just don't need and that's a huge plus.

I'm reading the Emma Smith book, but I'm also reading Nicholas Sparks' "Dear John". I love his books, he is my favorite romance author.

I keep thinking about "LOST" and how will it end, I can't believe that it's just about over.

Can you believe that ABC has canceled "FlashForward", what the flip? I'm not happy about that. I also heard "Heroes" is being canceled, not too bummed about that though, once I got confused I lost interest.

I've also been doing word finds. My mother did those a lot. I'm becoming more like her in that way. I miss her so much.

I really want to to the observatory, I looked it up online and it seems so interesting. I've taken a liking to the sky lately. I think it's because it's the one thing that we can all agree on, you know astronomy, there is no right or wrong like in politics. I love politics, but it's getting ugly lately. I just want to learn about something that isn't so disagreeable and can cause others to become unpleasant.

It seems as though a lot of people around me have a loved one who is sick or dying or has died, I've been seeing it all week long on FB status updates. I hope everyone is well. How we take our health for granted, well I know I do. I know I take having three healthy beautiful boys for granted as well. I love my hubby and sons, so much. They are the best blessing ever!!

I had to get a crown at the dentist last night, I was very out of it from the drugs. Apparently, I said some weird things on the way home. But I pretty much knocked out once home and was zonked. Michael gave the boys a bath in our room and they were jumping on me and falling on me and I didn't wake up. So here's the funny part, Tommy pooped in the tub and Trenton started freaking out (Trenton is our neat freak). Of course this had to happen to Michael who doesn't change poopy diapers, and it had to happen to him while I was out. I had to share this because it was too funny not to.

Okay, well I think this is it for now. Maybe it's been boring for you, but it's been quite the experience for me.

I am a Mother

I just finished reading a wonderful book titled, "I am a Mother" written by Jane Clayson Johnson.

I absolutely love this book and enjoyed reading it. It was one of those books I couldn't put down, and when I had to, I couldn't wait to pick it up again. Jane has a lot of positive reminders about how wonderful motherhood is and how women should be proud of our roles as mothers and not feel as what we are doing is not that important.

She goes through all the ups and downs of motherhood but how it's all worth the energy, time, and dedication we put into it.

Many have the misconception that stay at home mothers are lazy, uneducated, or not career driven. If any of you are stay at home mothers, you obviously know how far from the truth this is. I've learned that the only way any one can truly understand how busy and all encompassing being a stay at home mother is, is to actually be one...or watch someone's children so that mommy and daddy can get away for a weekend.

I've often responded to the question, "What do you do?" with the simple answer, "I'm just a stay at home mom." Because while I know what I am doing is THE most important job that can ever be done, I also know that the majority of people don't see it the same way. I'm sure my response gives the wrong impression to the person asking the question, that even I am either not proud of what I do, or that even I myself feel as though what I'm doing is unimportant, or maybe that I am in fact lazy and uneducated.

Mothers need to be proud of who we are and what we do, with the understanding that most people will disagree or clearly won't understand why being a mother is so important to us. We need to show that being a mother is important to us, and that we feel it is important not only to our children, but to our society.

I was also reminded while reading this book about my divine nature, the inner part of me that just come naturally, everything being a woman is; meek, gentle, loving, virtuous, kind, giving, strong, and of course beautiful.

I will definitely read this book again.

Things Motherhood has taught me

*To never say never

*There is more than one way to do get things done

*I thought I knew it all because I was a preschool teacher, but once I became a parent I realized how wrong I was.

*I am a walking napkin for dirty faces

*My kisses have the power to make things all better

*Things won't always go as planned, and that's okay

*They grow too fast

*Time flies

*Each moment will never repeat itself, so take it all in

*Children are miracles

*Children are the greatest teachers

*Cherish all the kisses and hugs they give

*Children are sponges so fill them with positive, good, and integrity

*Let my children know they are the future of our country and the world is in their hands

*Two year old tantrums are nothing compared to teenage attitudes, so I will enjoy them while they last.

*God must always be involved in the upbringing of my children. If I do not seek his guidance and councel in child rearing, I will not be inspired with His knowledge and comfort.

*Being a mother is the most important job I can have as a woman. If I'm looking to change the world and make it a better place, I must teach my children to be good, positive, and virtuous; and to have integrity and self-discipline.

Lots to catch up on

Life as you can imagine has been pretty busy. I need to do better at this blog thingy. I don't know why it's hard for me to do this. Things happen through out the day and I think, "This is something I should blog about, folks might get a kick outta this." But I don't, for some reason I just don't do it.

But here I am, updating the world about the lives of the Crawley Clan.

Our boys are so fun and so funny. They say and do the cutest things that always keep a smile on our faces. It's hard to be upset, or even stay upset when the boys are around. Here are some of the funny things the boys have said recently:

Tommy

While we were out back playing, I was picking up Jack's poop and Tommy being the helper that he is said, "I'll help you mama."

"Oh no Tommy, this is a yucky job, but thank you. When you are a bit older, this will be your job, picking up Jack's poop"

Tommy replied enthusiasticlly, "Oh thank you mama."

Trenton

While we were sitting at dinner the other night, we were having steamed veggies and the boys were asking if Spider Man ate vegetables. I told them yes, he does and that's why he's so strong. Trenton picked up a sliced carrot and I told him that carrots were very good for him and will make his eyes strong. So he picked up two carrots and closed his eyes and put them on his eye lids.

Another classic Trenton moment was one morning while Michael was getting ready for work and I read a headline from the news that read "12 house dems to oppose public funding on abortion on health care bill" *silence* Trenton says proudly, "AMEN!"

(Well we all know how that played out in the end, darn donkies)

Joseph

Our little Joseph is talking a lot. He says; Jesus (he recognizes his pictures too),no, yes, butt, belly, shoes, socks, daddy, mama, church, done, more, down, fart, poop, please, thank you, sorry, and a few others. He's picked up on a lot of things, he's a three year old trapped in a one year old body. When we go for walks, Joseph will pick fights with all the dogs. Once they start barking, he stops and walks closer to the gate (not right up to it) and starts barking right back at them.

The other day, Joseph was sitting in his high chair and farted pretty loud, and said, "I farted." Tommy and Trenton couldn't stop laughing.

Well, Michael has been super busy with work. I'm so grateful for all he does. He puts a lot of time into the business and making sure the clients are happy, as well as the employees. The boys love him to peices, they enjoy being with him. He's been taking us all to the park a few times a week and the boys love it.

I've been busy with the boys as always. I was just released from my calling as the Beehive adviser (teaching 12 & 13 year old girls) in Young Women. I'm pretty bummed, but I am glad for the almost two years of service in the position. I taught some great girls, or I should say, they taught me a lot and are such great examples. I especially loved having my neice, Sara, in the class, her first Sunday as a beehive was also my first Sunday in the calling, that was pretty neat. I'll definitely miss the young women, but I will still see some of them often because they are such great helpers with our boys. I also plan to work on my Personal Progess, and hope to get my medallion in the near future.

So my new calling is teaching the five year olds in primary. I'm actually excited. I've been in Primary before, and it was always nice, but hard at the same time because it's two hours and I missed out on the other classes and Relief Society. But this will be my first time in Primary as a mother, and I already feel different about it. I know this is where I need to be, this is where the Lord wants me to be. It's actually an answer to prayer. I've been praying on how to teach my own children the Gospel, of course there are the basics, prayer and reading scripture and of course setting an example; but I've been feeling that it isn't enough. I've been wanting to do more.

Being a convert to the Gospel, I didn't grow up in the church and missed out on Primary and Young Women. Well now with this calling, I'll be familiar with the lessons and will be able to break down the Gospel in an easier way for our boys to understand. They know who Jesus is, and they know He loves them, but they don't quite understand what He has done for them. We've been talking about Easter and the resurrection but they don't quite get it. I recently purchased a childrens book that covers the topic pretty well, I just need to find a time when the boys will give me five minutes to focus on the miracle of the Savior.

I am looking forward to serving my calling and learning more about the children and how much the Savior loves them. I just hope that I can teach it in a way that the five year olds will understand. I'm so excited to learn from these special, little spirits.

I am so blessed. I love this Gospel and I know without a doubt, and with all my being that the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter day Saints is the true church of our Savior on the earth today.

Slow down...please

I can't get over how fast the boys are growing. Joseph is pretty much a three year old trapped in a one year old body. He is doing everything they are doing. I love having conversations with Tommy and Trenton, the things they say are priceless. In fact, today Trenton had a dirty diaper while famiy was here one of the uncle's said he'd change it (joking of course) and I asked Trenton if he could have anyone change his diaper in the whole world who would he pick, he pointed to a picture of the Savior and said, "Jesus". I thought it was so cute. I told him that Jesus would love to change his diaper no matter how stinky it was.

The other day, Tommy was being fussy and I told him not to be so fussy and he replied, "I'm not fussy, mama. I Tommy." I loved it.

Joseph is saying "eat", "cheese", "sock", "shoe", "no", "daddy" (his first word), "mama" (finally), and "night night". He also loves to dance.

I love my boys, there is never a dull moment with them.

Michael and I will be celebrating our 10 year anniversary this summer. I love him so much. I can't believe we've been together that long, it's gone by so fast. We've had a great ten years together and I hope we grow old together. Michael is trully my best friend. He knows how to make me laugh and smile, even when I am having a hard time.

Things are a bit hard for me these past few weeks, a lot of changes ahead. I'm glad I have him by my side.